With the Euros now in full swing, the weather exceptional and the beers flowing...

Date: 12/06/2021
Opposition: Old Pauline CC
Venue: Colets
Man of the match: Harry Copeland - Close one between the Skipper and Satro. A combination of Satro’s chat and the fact that Harry perfectly platformed the innings, means he just wins it.
Prat of the match: MPG/Quins Amateurs - I think sending off the wrong batsmen after someone else has given you chat for dropping a catch is pretty poor from me. But also losing my bye-less season is painful. Special mention to the Quins boys after drinking our kegs dry on the day before the hottest day of the summer.

With the Euros now in full swing, the weather exceptional and the beers flowing, the usual note taking for these reports, that normally starts on a Tuesday evening were particularly scarce this week with only the single entry in which to write this report. That singular entry being the answer to ‘What is a group of ducks called?’, in relation to the recent form of a person that isn’t even playing this week. So not off to go a good start. (Mikey, a group of ducks is known as; a raft, team or paddling of ducks.)

The challenge ahead? Old Pauline, away. Old Pauline have consistently been a team in recent years that we know we should beat yet fail to do so more often than not. A revitalised 1’s, on the back of last week’s euphoria were confident going into the week. Two changes from the last weeks triumph with Ali coming in for Mikey, who had pressing podcast commitments (In case you didn’t know, Michael does in fact have a podcast…) and James Caldwell in for Chris Cole who like in an American High School Hollywood drama, was barred from playing due to a lapse in his academics. Two big omissions with two very strong replacements.

Captain Fantastic with another must win toss, did what he does best and called correctly, putting us in on a very nice batting wicket knowing that a good start with the bat would likely do the job against a team yet to score north of 160. Harry and DJ took to the crease and made the most of the early conditions, putting on a chanceless 50 partnership after the first 15 overs. DJ fell shortly after with Robbie now joining Harry in the middle before again putting on a second chanceless 50 partnership of the innings. For the first time since WW2, the Wick had made it to drinks less than 3 down.

With Robbie falling LBW in the 32nd over, Satro continued in the same form as those before him. With the ramp coming out left, right and centre, Harry went to 50 and had set the innings up perfectly. However, with the heat beaming and having batted back the 3rd full toss in row to a fielder, Harry like all good skippers, took one for the team and tried going over the top, likely knowing there would only be one outcome. Out came Ali at 5.

Eager to score in Mikey’s absence having got a TFC in his 1’s debut, Ali, along with Caldwell shortly after, couldn’t quite get going due to some tight bowling, negative field placing and the need to try and push the run rate up. With Satro nearing 50, the next 4 batsmen simply became the Hampton Wick 400 metre relay team, except with the last 4 wickets reading Run Out, Run Out, Run Out, Not Out, both qualification for Tokyo, as well as 250 runs on the board were both looking increasingly unlikely. However, with 63 runs put on in the last 10 overs and some big hitting from Satro, we finished on a very strong 223 from 49.5 overs (Sunny and Nick didn’t fancy the last ball).

With a score on the board and the announcement that the Old Pauline bar wouldn’t be opening this summer, there was a strong eagerness to get back to HQ as soon as possible. For the first 20 overs, standard procedure resumed with a combination of smart field placements and tight bowling lines, lead to a restriction of runs and a flow of steady wickets. Both Caldwell and Browning bowling at a 2.5 economy rate and taking a pair of wickets. By drinks, Old Pauline were 62-5 and were staring down the barrel of a comfortable loss, something that Wylie decided to tell each and every batsman who came to the crease.

Despite one partnership of resistance, the knowledge that we were well into a long tail and defending 7 an over, the team collectively fell into cruise control with some sloppy fielding, poor keeping and an unnecessary and very unwarranted send off, all of which should be forgiven, considering most of it was me. The spin triplets, as they often do, restored the balance again, eventually cleaning up the reminder of the Pauline wickets giving the good guys a very deserved 50 run victory. Despite finding out Chertsey had lost and therefore were top of the league, the news that the rugby boys had cleaned out the kegs on Friday night very quickly soured the day.

Player Ratings

Harry Copeland – 51 off 84 balls. 8/10

Proper captains knock on the back of some tough conditions in previous weeks. Back-to-back 50 partnerships with the rest of the top order meant the middle order could bat with freedom and really take the game away.

Dom Jones – 24 off 59 balls. 6/10

Claims he hit his LBW; Harry was quoted ‘Looked pretty stone dead from where I was’. Came from Edgbaston where the standard of cricket was probably not much better than ours.

Robbie Oliver – 34 off 47 balls. 7/10

For the first time in recent memory, Robbie didn’t do something stupid to get himself out. Carried on what DJ and Harry started and was sharp as ever in the field.

Satro Rambaran – 59 off 56 balls. 4-26 from 10 overs. 8/10

4 wickets and a 50. What more could you want from your all-rounder? Preferably less awful chat. Lost a point for spending the day calling the chuckle brothers ‘Nick Whitening’ and ‘Cloudy Patel’. It was truly painful.

Ali Higginson – 9 from 13 balls. 5/10

Decided to wash his kit the morning of the game meaning a late sprint through Vauxhall to make the ‘once per hour’ train. Solid in the field and probably wondering how on earth he doesn’t keep for the 1’s.

James Caldwell – 2 from 9 balls. 2-24 from 10 overs. 7/10

Stunning bowling performance as usual from Jimmy. Take out two boundaries in the first over and he went the next 9, conceding only 16.

Max Germain – 19 from 22 balls. 5/10

Being consistent is great unless it’s consistently average. Another late teens/early 20s score and despite spending an hour every Tuesday practicing keeping to spinners, he’s now 0 and 2 for caught behinds off a spinner. Sent off the wrong batsmen despite having no involvement in his wicket.

Jack Wylie – 3 from 3 balls. 0-40 from 7 overs. 4/10

The lack of runs on the scorecard doesn’t reflect the fact that Wylie ran about 25 runs in 3 overs off of other people’s bats. Probably why he went for over 5s with the ball.

Nick Browning – 5 from 4 balls. 2-21 from 8 overs. 6/10

Still can’t get over the fact he strapped his shoulder up to play beer pong with his ex-girlfriend. Selfishly dropped a dolly on the boundary, knowing that he was bowling the next over, meaning he could stat pad his figures.

Graeme Tong – 3 from 1 ball. 0-17 from 6 overs. 5/10

Provided coverage of the test match which was appreciated. However, did the token Graeme Tong move of running for a 3rd despite the ball being half way back to the stumps. Told me he that his weekly 6/10 was often harsh, so have adjusted accordingly.

Sunny Patel – 1 from 1 ball. 2-41 from 8 overs. 6/10

Was really gracious on the pitch after I dropped one off his bowling, however, came back to the clubhouse and told everyone it was an absolute dolly (it was).

Man of the Match – Harry Copeland

Close one between the Skipper and Satro. A combination of Satro’s chat and the fact that Harry perfectly platformed the innings, means he just wins it.

Dick of the Day – MPG/Quins Amateurs

I think sending off the wrong batsmen after someone else has given you chat for dropping a catch is pretty poor from me. But also losing my bye-less season is painful. Special mention to the Quins boys after drinking our kegs dry on the day before the hottest day of the summer.